As the saying goes, change is good, but anyone going through major changes will also tell you that it is never easy. I can't really claim any real change for my life yet, but I do know that we are on the verge of it over here. Consequently, I have been a giant ball of stress. Rick and I have decided that now is the time to move forward and to jump into the first time home buying decision. In the coming weeks we will hopefully be looking for a place to settle ourselves for a good long while.
I haven't wanted to really say much about it because even though I am not a superstitious person, I never like sharing possibilities that are still teetering on the brink of happening or not. I like to hold it close to me for fear that if I spread the good news before it's come true, it would be too much tempting for the fickle fates. Bottling things up has always been my main coping default and I think that is why I have a bumper crop of white hairs sprouting like stubborn yard dandelions. Pluck one, look away for a day and now you have forty, aaah!
To combat both the stress and mid winter cabin fever I have taken to Yoga with a new kind of zeal. Running is usually my main gig, and although athletes already have a natural amount of grace, yoga requires just a teensy bit more. And by yoga's standards I am not graceful (and my parents would argue that I never have been). I have no idea how people could subject themselves to looking like tippy, floppy fools in stretchy pants in public. Rick claims not to see me flop around, but I think he's just a very smart man who knows when to keep his mouth zipped. He's smart like that. All of the stretching and bending seems to be paying off. Not on my waistline but in my brain. Finally I have found something besides pounding the pavement, that takes my brain and hits the pause button. Thank goodness, because the below freezing temperatures and sub-zero wind chills that have been hanging over my neck of the woods for weeks now had been keeping me indoors like a caged animal. A lazy, more-than-happy-to-sit-on-my-bum caged animal.
And that is how I've been. A steady upward incline of stress build up only stop it dead in its tracks in the evening. Up then down and all over again the next day. I suppose my dad was right when he used to tell me that I need to not be too sensitive. But what else can you really expect from a Pisces?